Anxiety is a normal part of life for children, but sometimes it can become overwhelming and hard to cope with. If your child or young person feels anxious for long periods of time, it is worth considering professional help. We’ve got advice to help you provide reassuring support, work on strategies together and find a therapist if they need one.
Kids have different indicators of anxiety, depending on their age, but some common ones include irritability, a sense of being on edge, trouble concentrating or feeling shaky, and physical symptoms like stomach upset or sweating. Children often don’t know why they are anxious, so it is important to listen and take their feelings seriously.
For some children, their anxiety is triggered by specific things, such as a fear of dogs or public speaking. In other cases, the anxiety is more generalised, and they feel overwhelmed by changes to their routine or environment, or by social situations. Some children will become hypervigilant, and misinterpret innocuous cues as signs of danger, which can be very exhausting for them and their parents. Children who have very serious anxiety may benefit from psychotherapy.
Some anxiety can be helped with behavioural therapy, such as learning how to recognise triggers and respond appropriately, or gradually exposing them to the things they fear, in small doses. This can be done under the supervision of a therapist or nurse, who can monitor for a reaction and give advice. Psychotherapy is usually covered by health insurance, and you might be able to get a referral through your child’s doctor or school psychologist.
Other treatments can also be helpful, such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). This involves helping them understand why their fears are irrational and teaching them coping skills to manage those feelings, including learning to challenge negative automatic thoughts. Other options include medications, or group CBT (cognitive behavioural group therapy) and exposure and response prevention (ERP).
It is important for parents to get some support too. Children pick up on their parent’s stress and worries, so if you are struggling, it is worth reaching out for help. This could be from family, friends, social services or your faith community. Make sure you take the time to care for yourself, too. Children and young people who are feeling very anxious should always see a GP, as they may need specialist CYPMHS (children and young people’s mental health services).
Most importantly, don’t let your child or young person’s anxiety stop them from living their lives. They can learn to manage their anxiety and develop a more positive outlook over the long term. In the meantime, here are some tips from three psychologists who offer compassionate and effective ways to help your child wade through the choppy waters of anxiety.